I’m sitting
watching T.V. and all the healthy shows
They’re
advertising treadmills, bikes and on and on it goes
I watch
those guys do sit ups, push ups they look fab
They’re
saying that it helps you it helps produce good abs
I head out
to the kitchen to grab a snack or two
There’s not
much in the cupboard I wonder what I’ll do
The food
supply is getting low I’ll have to get some more
I’d better
get in to the car and head off to the store
I grab a
cart and start my shopping I grab some chips and pop
Throw in a
couple of candy bars now this is the way to shop
A couple of
steaks here and there maybe some burgers too
I’ll grab a tub of ice cream I think that this
will do
I head over
to the check-out and as I’m standing there in line
I look at
some health magazines just to pass the time
I read a
little article of choices that we make
It talks of
all the fat we eat and our calorie intake
They talk
about the things we buy like candy, pop, and chips
They say it
does no good at all as it all goes to our hips
I look down
at my shopping cart to see the things I’ve bought
I head back
out the check-out to get veggies I forgot
I grab some
grapes and oranges some apples and lots more fruit
Potatoes,
carrots, kale and spinach, celery, leek to make a soup
I decide to
return my chips and pop as I’m heading down the aisle
I grab my
stuff and put it back I won’t need it for a while
I head back
to the check-out and I’m smiling as I go
I know that
I’ll be eating healthy and I know that it will show
As I’m
standing with my cart and I’m waiting there in line
I look down
at this person’s cart which is looking really fine
I notice
that they have some pop, some candy, chips that’s true
I look down
at my own cart ‘cause I don’t know what to do
I head back
out the check-out line and go straight back to the chips
A couple of
bags, some cans of pop really shouldn’t affect my hips
As I’m
going past the veggie section I unload all I got
I thought I
took too much anyway I really had a lot
I go back
to the check-out where I stand again in line
I’m on my
way to a grand old feast everything will be just fine
As I’m
standing with my cart in hand I glare at this person’s cart
They have
veggies, fruit and healthy stuff my mind is torn apart
I head back
out the check-out as I leave my cart behind
I’ve had
enough of shopping as I’m going out my mind
I said who
cares; I don’t need the stuff as I run right out the store
I find the
nearest restaurant eat burgers, fries and pop galore
Ah! This is
so much better than shopping any day
I’ll eat
until my heart’s content so I don’t fade away
They can
keep their diets and healthy stuff to get abs I’m just not keen
Give me
another pop and fries and give me a large poutine
I may be
fat and beefy and I may not look too good
But at
least I enjoy my life once more ‘cause I really enjoy my food
Mmmmmmm Mmmmmmm
Written by
Chris Turner
October 24,
2013