Wednesday, May 31, 2017

"I am crying on the inside"

"I am crying on the inside"

Deep down, inside, I am crying, but no one can see how I feel
When you're a man, it is not expected, but in my mind I know it is real
I cry all the time on the inside, afraid to express how I feel
The tears they build up with emotion, but in my mind, I have to conceal

Everybody going about doing their own thing, never giving, a thought just for me
I don't show my feelings like they do, how I feel, they just cannot see
Many times I have thoughts now of leaving, I just have to leave and get away
There is no one in my family who needs me; it's really hard, right now for me to stay

Friends tell me how I'm getting older, which I try so hard to ignore
But every day I'm always reminded, it penetrates, deeply to the core
The struggle, it is too hard to handle, I know I can't take it anymore
My wife, she has even disowned me, I know our marriage, is just about o'er

I'm not looking for sympathy from no one, especially when they don't understand
It's hard to communicate how I feel; after all, I am just a man
I've tried so hard in this life just to make it, but things keep falling apart
I think it's time for me, to have to leave now, I think it's time to make a brand new start
I've given my family everything, through the years now I'm kind of broke
My family seem to be self-centred and I feel that it is a joke
I get up early in the morning and bake muffins and really, only think of them
As I'm standing in my kitchen I am crying, on the inside, I know it is the end

I just made my kids some frittatas, because I know I love all of them
It helps them when they're hungry; I make them now and again
Feeling lonely through life as I walk alone, as I'm always feeling condemned
Right now I'm crying on the inside, yes I know, I am just a man

Written by Chris Turner
May 31, 2017